Jack-in-the-box.

Jack-in-the-box

Did you ever play with a jack-in-the-box when you were little.  You know the toy, where you crank the handle, and the song "Pop goes the weasel" plays.  You know what is coming, you know this scary-funny looking clown thing is going to pop up, and you are going to be startled.  You just don't know when.  You turn, and turn, and turn the handle, waiting for the inevitable to happen.

That is how I feel.  I feel like a ticking time bomb.  I just know that the day is going to come when my cancer is going to rear it's ugly head again.  I just don't know when or where.   Some days  I can almost forget that I have cancer, but the reality is that those terrible little cancer cells are still there, just waiting to "POP" into growing and spreading again.  The fear is always there in the back corner of my mind, no matter how hard I try to shove it out my head.  I can't forget.  

I try to just enjoy turning the handle of life, enjoying the music and happy times.  And hopefully I won't scare too bad when "Pop goes the cancer!!!!"

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